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  • Fancy being a spy?

    Job advert posted on the UK goverment jobs site

    https://jobsearch.direct.gov.uk/GetJ...x?JobID=270089
    Shop at the Wampstore

  • #2
    Rofl!

    They've just started this new work portal thing so I think somebody has found a loophole somewhere.
    "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area" - UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer
    "I think they should all be topless, they're just more fun that way" - Vegascat
    "I once hit a guy in the face with a crap" - NeatPete
    "The doctor put me on a course of placebos," said the lady in the straw hat. "But I don't take them. I'm saving them all up for a mock suicide attempt."
    "Unleash a rancid potpourri of lunacy!" - Games Workshop Website.
    "I used to be Sheogorath but I took an arrow to the knee."

    Comment


    • #3
      Link's gone now as I got the job. Damn, shouldn't have said that should I? Guess I've just lost the job now....
      "I lOVE your attitude Wag - painting for the hell of it, because you want to - one of the best things I did was invite you over here as to me you invoke the wamp spirit perfectly." - thankyou DL !

      "...you've done things with Blood Bowl Orcs that I wouldn't have thought possible. Certainly wouldn't have thought they were sensible!..." - Lobo, Iron Painter 8 competition

      Comment


      • #4
        For those who missed it I saved a copy of the page
        Secret Intelligence Service

        Target Elimination Specialist

        Job description

        From time to time the UK government has a need to remove people whose continued existence poses a risk to the effective conduct of public order. So we require particularly skilled professionals who are prepared to work on a non-attributable basis to deal with these problems.



        The role will involve international travel to a number of countries where individuals need to be removed.



        The ideal candidate will need to have no particular distinguishing features so as to blend in and be able to take on new identities as required. They will need to be resourceful in finding ways to accomplish their missions and, in some cases, to leave foreign countries by non-conventional means. The role would suit candidates with prior military experience, particularly in the use of sniper rifles.



        The job holder will receive all necessary equipment, including passports, special watches, jet packs, mini-submarines and a Walther PPK.



        This role is particularly appropriate for those who like their martinis shaken and not stirred.




        To apply for this role, please express your interest somewhere in the vicinity of the large and rather fake-looking rock in Regent's Park.
        "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area" - UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer
        "I think they should all be topless, they're just more fun that way" - Vegascat
        "I once hit a guy in the face with a crap" - NeatPete
        "The doctor put me on a course of placebos," said the lady in the straw hat. "But I don't take them. I'm saving them all up for a mock suicide attempt."
        "Unleash a rancid potpourri of lunacy!" - Games Workshop Website.
        "I used to be Sheogorath but I took an arrow to the knee."

        Comment


        • #5
          Tried the jet pack out in the garden and burnt the shed down...
          "I lOVE your attitude Wag - painting for the hell of it, because you want to - one of the best things I did was invite you over here as to me you invoke the wamp spirit perfectly." - thankyou DL !

          "...you've done things with Blood Bowl Orcs that I wouldn't have thought possible. Certainly wouldn't have thought they were sensible!..." - Lobo, Iron Painter 8 competition

          Comment


          • #6
            do I get an Aston Martin?
            The best thing my mates & I have done: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWG9MFQ6Tcs




            Me on Putty&Paint

            Comment


            • #7
              In Croatia you get the 2CV
              "I lOVE your attitude Wag - painting for the hell of it, because you want to - one of the best things I did was invite you over here as to me you invoke the wamp spirit perfectly." - thankyou DL !

              "...you've done things with Blood Bowl Orcs that I wouldn't have thought possible. Certainly wouldn't have thought they were sensible!..." - Lobo, Iron Painter 8 competition

              Comment


              • #8
                that's why I want to become a british spy :-P


                actually here, there is a scandal because the regular police was spying on our head of secret service LOL so you aren't far off...
                The best thing my mates & I have done: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWG9MFQ6Tcs




                Me on Putty&Paint

                Comment


                • #9
                  so the head of your 'secret' service isn't so secret after all
                  "I lOVE your attitude Wag - painting for the hell of it, because you want to - one of the best things I did was invite you over here as to me you invoke the wamp spirit perfectly." - thankyou DL !

                  "...you've done things with Blood Bowl Orcs that I wouldn't have thought possible. Certainly wouldn't have thought they were sensible!..." - Lobo, Iron Painter 8 competition

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    nope. and his conversations (over the phone) ended up in the newspapers. so the police who spies on the secret service has leaks...
                    we are a joke of a country, what can I say...
                    The best thing my mates & I have done: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWG9MFQ6Tcs




                    Me on Putty&Paint

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      It's all a load of Balkans if you ask me.
                      "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area" - UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer
                      "I think they should all be topless, they're just more fun that way" - Vegascat
                      "I once hit a guy in the face with a crap" - NeatPete
                      "The doctor put me on a course of placebos," said the lady in the straw hat. "But I don't take them. I'm saving them all up for a mock suicide attempt."
                      "Unleash a rancid potpourri of lunacy!" - Games Workshop Website.
                      "I used to be Sheogorath but I took an arrow to the knee."

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        the worst thing is that if you think you have it better, you're probably wrong. It's just hasn't been discovered
                        The best thing my mates & I have done: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWG9MFQ6Tcs




                        Me on Putty&Paint

                        Comment

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